Comments on: Straight Partnerships: Saying No to Marriage http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/ We're here, We're queer, and We're not going Shopping without Coupons Thu, 18 Mar 2010 03:42:20 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: mapgirl http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-11540 mapgirl Thu, 11 Jan 2007 20:28:29 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-11540 Just this week I was thinking about this post and Queercents. Two of my lesbian friends are going to have a baby and I mentioned this site to them and specifically this post. You can measure a site's usefulness by whether or not you can mention it in conversation with your friends. This site totally rocks!<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-11540">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> Just this week I was thinking about this post and Queercents. Two of my lesbian friends are going to have a baby and I mentioned this site to them and specifically this post.

You can measure a site’s usefulness by whether or not you can mention it in conversation with your friends. This site totally rocks!

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]]> By: Jonathan http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-1381 Jonathan Thu, 05 Oct 2006 23:02:47 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-1381 Very interesting... I must admit I never even thought about many of these issues at all. I now need to ask my best friend what he thinks of this (being gay and also the best man at my [somewhat fancy] wedding and all). I hope he wasn't grouchy at me!<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-1381">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> Very interesting… I must admit I never even thought about many of these issues at all. I now need to ask my best friend what he thinks of this (being gay and also the best man at my [somewhat fancy] wedding and all). I hope he wasn’t grouchy at me!

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]]> By: tiredbuthappy http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-1362 tiredbuthappy Mon, 02 Oct 2006 22:33:29 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-1362 Thanks for some thoughtful comments. FYI, there are a few less positive comments, and my responses, over at My Open Wallet. See <a>this post by Madame X</a> and read the comments for some useful critiques of my post.<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-1362">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> Thanks for some thoughtful comments. FYI, there are a few less positive comments, and my responses, over at My Open Wallet. See this post by Madame X and read the comments for some useful critiques of my post.

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]]> By: The Carnival of Personal Finance ‘68 Hits the Oregon Trail | Punny Money http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-1355 The Carnival of Personal Finance ‘68 Hits the Oregon Trail | Punny Money Mon, 02 Oct 2006 08:13:34 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-1355 [...] We’re almost to Fort Kearney. Today we met a couple who’ve been together for years and have children but aren’t married. At first, I suspected they didn’t marry because of the advantages of a couple remaining unmarried, but then I found out they were brother and sister and couldn’t legally get married in their home state and were heading to Oregon to see if they could get the job done there. [...]<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-1355">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> [...] We’re almost to Fort Kearney. Today we met a couple who’ve been together for years and have children but aren’t married. At first, I suspected they didn’t marry because of the advantages of a couple remaining unmarried, but then I found out they were brother and sister and couldn’t legally get married in their home state and were heading to Oregon to see if they could get the job done there. [...]

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]]> By: everyday-asian.com » Stealing, Money, Marriage http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-1346 everyday-asian.com » Stealing, Money, Marriage Fri, 29 Sep 2006 15:34:35 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-1346 [...] In other news, Queercents had an insightful article about marriage and money. The pressure to be married is something that I complain a lot about it on my blog, and I didn’t even really understand what it means legally and financially. It’s depressing. Even if I feel like I don’t “need” a marriage to prove my relationship, the law kinda forces me into it. A double-edged sword: homosexuals are dying for the right to be married, and here I am wishing I had the right to NOT get married. Filed under: Quarter-Life, Money — [...]<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-1346">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> [...] In other news, Queercents had an insightful article about marriage and money. The pressure to be married is something that I complain a lot about it on my blog, and I didn’t even really understand what it means legally and financially. It’s depressing. Even if I feel like I don’t “need” a marriage to prove my relationship, the law kinda forces me into it. A double-edged sword: homosexuals are dying for the right to be married, and here I am wishing I had the right to NOT get married. Filed under: Quarter-Life, Money — [...]

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]]> By: beeble http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-1336 beeble Thu, 28 Sep 2006 01:57:43 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-1336 What a wonderful post. As I see friends getting married in extragavant weddings, I have come to despise the display. While I believe in marriage, I have moments where I'm not sure if I'm ready for it or even want it or is society pushing the trappings of weddings onto me. Thank you for a great post about the alternatives to marriage and how a couple with a child can live happily unmarried. Thank you again.<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-1336">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> What a wonderful post. As I see friends getting married in extragavant weddings, I have come to despise the display. While I believe in marriage, I have moments where I’m not sure if I’m ready for it or even want it or is society pushing the trappings of weddings onto me. Thank you for a great post about the alternatives to marriage and how a couple with a child can live happily unmarried. Thank you again.

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]]> By: Madame X http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-1329 Madame X Wed, 27 Sep 2006 16:43:02 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-1329 This is one of the best and most useful personal finance blog posts I've ever read-- people so rarely talk about how these issues affect both gay and straight people, and even when they do, I've never seen an article that really laid everything out so clearly like this. Thank you!<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-1329">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> This is one of the best and most useful personal finance blog posts I’ve ever read– people so rarely talk about how these issues affect both gay and straight people, and even when they do, I’ve never seen an article that really laid everything out so clearly like this. Thank you!

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]]> By: Dana http://queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-1325 Dana Wed, 27 Sep 2006 07:04:05 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/09/26/straight-partnerships-saying-no-to-marriage/#comment-1325 It's too late at night for me to compose a long response, but I'll point out that in Massachusetts, where same-sex couples can marry, some companies are now halting domestic-partner benefits. Long-term commitment equals marriage, as they see it. This is clearly a problem for those couples--LGBT and straight--who choose not to marry. And a few related links: Beyondmarriage.org is another site worth looking at for a perspective on alternatives to marriage. Atticus Circle (www.atticuscircle.org) is a fairly new organization of straight allies that might also be of interest. It "[encourages] acceptance of all families and partnerships."<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-1325">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> It’s too late at night for me to compose a long response, but I’ll point out that in Massachusetts, where same-sex couples can marry, some companies are now halting domestic-partner benefits. Long-term commitment equals marriage, as they see it. This is clearly a problem for those couples–LGBT and straight–who choose not to marry.

And a few related links:

Beyondmarriage.org is another site worth looking at for a perspective on alternatives to marriage.

Atticus Circle (www.atticuscircle.org) is a fairly new organization of straight allies that might also be of interest. It “[encourages] acceptance of all families and partnerships.”

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