“Where there is no imagination there is no horror.” — Arthur Conan Doyle, Sr.

HalloweenGays typically love Halloween. Tonight, the largest adult outdoor Halloween event in the world takes place in West Hollywood where the city bills it as “Hot guys, skin, and creative costumes!”

I’ve lived in the LA area for almost a decade and I’ve never driven into WeHo on Halloween night. I have weird issues about this holiday that creep back from childhood. As Pentecostals, my parents did not allow us to celebrate like all the other neighborhood kids. Instead, the church provided an alternative masked as a “Harvest Festival” where we would go and play silly carnival games in the church basement to win candy. I specifically remember bobbing for apples… which is a really bad idea if you’re wearing face paint or princess glitter.

Of course, the costumes had to be uplifting and not hint of anything to do with the occult. No witches, ghosts, or vampires. It’s the one thing about Christianity that I didn’t rebel from… I actually agree that it’s a dark and ghoulish holiday and was fine being carted off to church for the evening.

I find it fitting then, that as an adult, I now live on a dead-end street and even though it is smack in the middle of safe suburbia, we get “zero” trick-or-treaters. Zilch. Zip. Not a one. This of course disappoints Jeanine. She likes the holiday. I, however, like the fact that we don’t have to spend thirty dollars on candy.

James Westhead at the BBC reported that, “Americans will spend more than $4.95B – yes billion – on costumes, candy, cards and decorations – that’s five times more money than they will spend on the midterm elections this year.”

According to MSN Money, “That translates to about $59.06 in spending for the average consumer. Halloween has turned into the second- or third-biggest party night of the year, depending on who’s counting, behind New Year’s Eve and Super Bowl Sunday. Hallmark makes more than 300 Halloween cards.” Of course, if I did give cards on this holiday, I would be making my own and saving $2.99 each. After all, how hard could it be to make a card with a jack-o-lantern on it?

Finally, whether you have kids bringing it home or bags leftover from handing it out, there’s the problem with what to do with all those treats at the end of the night. Lifehacker points you to a list of Ten Things You Can Do With Halloween Candy. Jeanine will be taking that one bag we bought “just in case” to the office on Wednesday. Happy Halloween.