America AirlinesGrandpa: Are we there yet? Homer: No
Grandpa: Are we there yet? Homer: No
Grandpa: Are we there yet? Homer: No
Grandpa: … Where are we going?
– From the Simpsons

Ever heard of a mileage run? According to Wikipedia, “A mileage run is a paid/revenue airline trip designed solely for gaining maximum frequent flyer miles and/or points for no other reason than to gain the miles and/or points.”

James Gilden at the LA Times writes, “It is a ritual of fall that only hard-core business travelers can understand, and it’s all about racking up frequent-flier miles.”

At the USA Today, David Grossman explains, “Most travelers take a mileage run to assure or retain elite status for the following year in a specific airline mileage program. Elite status is a valuable commodity. Elite members usually board the aircraft first, bypass check-in lines and go through a special security line at many airports. They are given special phone numbers for reservations or itinerary changes that offer minimal wait times. They are showered with thousands of additional bonus miles on every trip. And perhaps, most importantly, they usually receive unlimited free or inexpensive first class upgrades.”

“Larry Fields recently took a mileage run. The SBC research analyst earned more than 9,000 miles on a $430 Delta ticket to Costa Rica from his home in San Leandro, Calif.”

Back at the LA Times, James Gilden from continues with his analysis, “At FlyerTalk.com, there is a forum dedicated just to mileage runs. And this time of year, it is abuzz with requests for advice and examples of mileage runs cobbled together that maximize mileage at minimal cost.” Gilden outlined this mileage run case study:

“Albert Williams of Portland, Ore., has been a member of FlyerTalk for about a year and it’s paying off this fall. He spends half his workweeks on the road and knew that this year he would be flying about 60,000 miles for his job and several thousand more miles on international flights for pleasure. As the year-end approached, he found he was just short of United’s 1K level.”

“And his fiancee, Margaret McLain, also of Portland, needed more miles to lift her from Premier status to Premier Executive, also on United. So they decided on a joint mileage run.”

“Williams started his research at FareCompare.com, a website that finds and compares low airfares. It has a tool that enables travelers to determine the lowest price per mile for a flight. It was designed with those who are planning mileage runs in mind, FareCompare Chief Executive Rick Seaney said.”

“On the site, Williams found that a trip to Orlando, Fla., could be had for pennies per mile. But to get enough miles for McLain to qualify for Premier Executive, a nonstop flight would not do. ‘I played around with other routings that would boost up the mileage,’ he said, using another website, ITA Software, to actually plot their flights. Despite finding the site a bit difficult to navigate, he created their perfect prenuptial mileage run.”

“On Dec. 9, they are scheduled to fly from Portland to San Francisco to Washington and would arrive late that night in Orlando. The next day after only six hours on the ground, they plan to fly back to Portland via Chicago, Kansas City, Kan., and Denver. Total miles flown would be 6,756 ” or just 15 miles more than McLain needs to earn Premier Executive status.”

“At $239 apiece for that Orlando trip, the pair would get their upgrades, and it would be well worth it, they said. Williams figures that the six systemwide upgrades that United awards at the 100,000-mile level are worth $12,000 alone in international upgrades, not to mention all the other perks of that elite status.”

So I’m at 81,000 elite qualifying miles — 19,000 short of the 100K I need to make Executive Platinum… unfortunately I would need a couple mileage runs before the end of the year to make the super elite status on American. I already tried pulling some strings, but that didn’t work.