Comments on: Secret Lives of Breadwinner Wives http://queercents.com/2006/12/06/secret-lives-of-breadwinner-wives/ We're here, We're queer, and We're not going Shopping without Coupons Wed, 10 Mar 2010 04:23:21 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: Nina http://queercents.com/2006/12/06/secret-lives-of-breadwinner-wives/comment-page-1/#comment-9277 Nina Wed, 20 Dec 2006 19:33:02 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/12/06/secret-lives-of-breadwinner-wives/#comment-9277 Part of Carnival of Feminists - Dec 2006: http://imponderabilia.blogspot.com/2006/12/29th-carnival-of-feminists.html<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-9277">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> Part of Carnival of Feminists – Dec 2006:
http://imponderabilia.blogspot.com/2006/12/29th-carnival-of-feminists.html

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]]> By: Dana http://queercents.com/2006/12/06/secret-lives-of-breadwinner-wives/comment-page-1/#comment-7654 Dana Thu, 07 Dec 2006 00:47:29 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/12/06/secret-lives-of-breadwinner-wives/#comment-7654 You ask "After all, how many [wo]men marry women hoping they will switch roles as breadwinner at some point?" I can't say I married for this reason, but as it turns out, my partner and I have each taken turns as the breadwinner in our household. For the first ten years of our relationship, we both worked. When my partner was pregnant with our son, and for almost a year after his birth, I worked while she stayed home. Now she's working while I stay home with our son. Once he's in school full time, I'll look for employment again. We didn't plan it this way--it was a result of both personal circumstance and corporate reorganization--but we're glad to be in a relationship where we each feel comfortable being either the breadwinner or primary childcare provider. We both threw our resumes into the ring last time, and chose which of us worked outside the home based on the job offers we each got. That may not be typical, but it works for us.<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-7654">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> You ask “After all, how many [wo]men marry women hoping they will switch roles as breadwinner at some point?” I can’t say I married for this reason, but as it turns out, my partner and I have each taken turns as the breadwinner in our household. For the first ten years of our relationship, we both worked. When my partner was pregnant with our son, and for almost a year after his birth, I worked while she stayed home. Now she’s working while I stay home with our son. Once he’s in school full time, I’ll look for employment again.

We didn’t plan it this way–it was a result of both personal circumstance and corporate reorganization–but we’re glad to be in a relationship where we each feel comfortable being either the breadwinner or primary childcare provider. We both threw our resumes into the ring last time, and chose which of us worked outside the home based on the job offers we each got. That may not be typical, but it works for us.

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]]> By: Neo's Friend http://queercents.com/2006/12/06/secret-lives-of-breadwinner-wives/comment-page-1/#comment-7602 Neo's Friend Wed, 06 Dec 2006 14:34:16 +0000 http://www.queercents.com/2006/12/06/secret-lives-of-breadwinner-wives/#comment-7602 Keep in mind though that different professional cultures have different generalized habits. In my world, academics tend to stick together both in part because they tend to be in a similar financial boat but also because they have similar relationships to time. An academic is always in some way poised to be working. It's not for the faint of heart and a certain love of your work must be involved. In short, the dynamics can be more complicated than simply talking about income disparity will convey. Academics tend to also avoid surrounding themselves with "too much" money, having a preference instead for lots of cultural capital. It's an internal bias that is in some way the opposite of the Cindarella effect.<p class="top-comments">Current score: <span class="top-comments-karma" id="karma-7602">0</span> <small>(to vote for this comment, please visit the site)</small></p> Keep in mind though that different professional cultures have different generalized habits. In my world, academics tend to stick together both in part because they tend to be in a similar financial boat but also because they have similar relationships to time. An academic is always in some way poised to be working. It’s not for the faint of heart and a certain love of your work must be involved. In short, the dynamics can be more complicated than simply talking about income disparity will convey. Academics tend to also avoid surrounding themselves with “too much” money, having a preference instead for lots of cultural capital. It’s an internal bias that is in some way the opposite of the Cindarella effect.

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