In Need of Tissues
As my second set of friends embark on a pregnancy by a sperm donor, I read an ad in the paper offering $100 for the blood plasma of allergy sufferers. It’s not so much about the money for me, as is the idea that my donation could help medical science help people like me. (I have terrible hay fever, allergies and immune issues.) Of course, I would love to think that the man who donates sperm to help my friends start their little queer family is doing it more for humanity than the money. A Canadian study just proved that queers make good parents.
In the past, when I was short on cash, I would do a short stint as a stripper. My feminist sisters definitely thought that this was “selling my body.” 
I never understood the logic of this phrase considering I was never touched by clients and I left the club with all of my parts intact. These days I guess I’m more likely to actually leave something behind if I need money. I don’t think there’s anything particularly terrible about stripping, it’s just that there’s no lasting product of love or hope like in body fluid donation.
Here’s the low-down on how to sell your body and feel good about it:
Plasma. In many places, you can donate blood for $20 a bag if you are disease free and not anemic. Plasma is up to $150. Donating plasma actually takes less time to recover from because as they remove the plasma, they put the red blood cells back into your blood stream. For blood donation, you must be healthy. For plasma donation, you can sometimes get more money if you have an allergies, an immune disorder, or have been vaccinated for Hepatitis B.
I’m going to sell some plasma for medical research. In my mind, my own plasma will make it so that I have some relief from my allergies a few years down the line. But there’s another reason” We’re talking immune system here, antibodies, white blood cells and T-cells. The more we know about our immune responses, the closer we are to a cure for AIDS.
Sperm. There are two main downfalls about donating sperm. The first is How to Sell Sperm’s step two:
“Provide a sample for preliminary screening. It will be frozen, then thawed a week later to check for cryosurvival. Semen must meet minimum requirements for motility, morphology and sperm count. Most potential donors–up to 95 percent–are disqualified.” But there’s a bonus even if you don’t get in: application is a great way to get all of your extensive STD testing done for free.
You’d better have confidence in your swimmers, knowledge of your family medical history and the extra time needed to complete the paperwork. The other downfall is that some programs want you to keep that sperm in for two days prior to donation and also ask you to donate three times a week- you do the math. There isn’t a day left for your own fun. They take sperm from men age 19-39.
The good news: “Fees paid range from $35 per donation to $900 per month for three samples a week. Donors qualify for bonuses for successful referrals and when they exit the program.” And once you go through the laborious beginning of the program, it gets easier and you can keep donating until your sperm has conceived ten children.
As a gay man, your sexual identity will be asked but will not be discriminated against, although banks prefer that you are in a monogamous committed relationship. You can be a known donor (not anonymous) through just about any bank and California has one just for gay men. These days the highest percentage of people buying sperm is the female-female couple. I myself might buy some of your sperm one day.
What about eggs? Selling Eggs is trickier, though it pays up to five thousand and you can do it in any city just through finding want ads in the paper. Two of my friends did this to help with college tuition and both wished they hadn’t. The hormones you have to inject into yourself to produce extra eggs can really wreak havoc on your physical and emotional health. But if you have a great constitution and a good head about it, it is a great option for everyone. Environmental factors are making more and more women sterile. I know a wonderful straight family who are very grateful they had the option to pay for healthy eggs.
The American Association of Tissue Banks estimates that it’s a 80 million a year industry. They will make much more off of you than you will off of them. Plasma donation isn’t without risks and sperm donation requires lots of time and effort. Make sure you are doing it at least partly for charitable reasons so you don’t feel used.
One thing to note about egg donation — they generally accept women only up to age 32, and the chances of being selected are higher if you are in your 20s.
I had a friend donate eggs before starting medical school. She felt wonderful about being able to help a family have children who otherwise would not have been able to do so — and about paying off her car before starting med school. 🙂
I was an egg donor myself (I told them the truth, that I was bisexual, and they didn’t blink, by the way; gay men who are open about their orientation may be turned down as sperm donors.). The thing nobody tells you about egg donation is that it takes time for all the doctor’s appointments. Three preliminary appointments, followed by two appointments to get started, and, at the end, an appointment for a blood test nearly every morning. If you already have a job, this can be difficult to fit in. I also had to take three days off of work for, and after, the “extraction.” It is really physically taxing, and I didn’t do it again, either.
Even better are some of the other medical studies that are out there.
I found out about one yesterday at my doctor’s office- seeking overweight women in my age range without diabetes for an exercise program. I thnk I might just do it! The motivation for some unexpected discretionary fund PLUS exercise.