when i think about it itouch myselfThere are essentially two kinds of financial dilemmas: happy and unhappy. Unhappy dilemmas are the ones where you have to decide which credit cards you aren’t going to pay so you can keep electricity on in the middle of winter. There are also dilemmas that we still agonize over even though they’re a result of a good situation. An example would be choosing between a driving tour of Tuscany or a cruise to Mykonos.

My happy dilemma came with the tentative decision to purchase an iTouch, a portable wifi device that runs about $300. It’s apparently also some sort of iPod, but who cares? I love the idea that I can access the net anywhere there’s wifi, especially for my upcoming trip to Los Angeles. I intend to eat at some of the newly rated Michelin star restaurants before hitting wine country.

I easily snagged seats at Urasawa, a three-star sushi restaurant. A single Michelin star is considered a great honor, while three set the global standard of excellence. The meal is “exquisite” raves the Gayot reviewer‘”gold leaf flaked tofu as a starter and sushi so delicate it must be eaten within ten seconds lest the rice warm the fish beyond its optimal temperature for consumption. And it’s one of the only places in the US licensed to serve blowfish; mmmmm sweet, deadly blowfish.

But it comes with a price’¦ about $275 for a single person, without alcohol, tip or tax. Even for a three-star, that’s a lot of clams. My platonic life partner, Russell, normally handles the financials but he recently returned from Europe and felt it out of budget’¦ unless I was willing to pay my own way.

It’s not that I don’t have the money, but an iTouch and a fancy meal all hitting my account within the same month feels a bit irresponsible, even with a large bonus on the way. Thus began my dilemma.

I’d get more use out of the iTouch’”it’s a durable object whereas a twenty-nine-course dinner will eventually end up’¦ elsewhere. But, thanks to Russell’s generosity, I’ve acquired a taste for fine modern cuisine. In a sense I felt it might be time to put my own money where my mouth was.

The ironic thing about “happy” financial dilemmas is that they can still make us feel pretty badly about ourselves and our situations. I’m essentially freeloading my way across the country and still too cheap to pay for my own food’”what’s wrong with me? At the same time, there’s almost no room for sympathy. I felt selfish for wanting the iPod but anxious that the meal might be disappointing with such high stakes.

In the end I went with the iTouch. I cancelled the reservations in favor of a more reasonable one-star restaurant, Providence (ultimately a very fine restaurant as well). Days after that one of my readers forwarded me an article by Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness:

Another thing we know from studies is that people tend to take more pleasure in experiences than in things. So if you have “x” amount of dollars to spend on a vacation or a good meal or movies, it will get you more happiness than a durable good or an object. One reason for this is that experiences tend to be shared with other people and objects usually aren’t. (Link)

And he’s right. The iTouch will certainly be a cool toy for months to come and I did fall asleep with it last night; but I can already feel the euphoria of acquisition wearing off as I carry the discarded Amazon packaging to my dumpster like old Christmas wrapping.  On the other hand, many experiences I’ve had dining and traveling continue to bring me happiness in unexpected ways: reminiscing with Russell about our adventures, having interesting stories to write about and (I must confess) the envy of others.

I think it’s important to remember why we choose to be healthy and responsible with our money. Fine dining and travel are partly why my 800 square foot place is sparsely furnished with secondhand IKEA. It’s not just about things we own or net worth’”money is about experiences as well. Just because something might seem like a waste of good money doesn’t necessarily mean it is.

When you decide to indulge in a little discretionary spending, do you go for objects or experiences?


When not devouring exotic, deadly creatures from the four corners of the earth, Mike writes for Broken Cupid, a dating blog for single gay guys.