The Pyramid Metaphor for Fiscal Fitness – Part 2
There is one pillar of the financial foundation (if you read part 1, this will make much more sense) that is especially important for non-traditional couples and that is a Durable Power of Attorney for Financial Management (DPAFM). If you become incapacitated and have not designated an attorney-in-fact or an agent via this document, the courts will likely choose your closest living relative (sibling, child, parent) to manage your financial affairs. This may be perfectly acceptable to you. If so, skip to the next paragraph. If, like me, your partner is your closest living relative regardless of legal definitions’¦read on. Remember that with few exceptions (states with gay marriage or civil unions), you and your partner have no legal status. If you wish to have your partner handle your affairs in the event you are unable to, you must have a DPAFM drafted by a knowledgeable attorney in your state. There are many ways to limit or condition these powers so that you need not feel any loss of control. It is equally important that this document be modified should the partnership dissolve.
Even more critical to non-traditional couples, (this one has nothing to do with fiscal fitness), is the Durable Power of Attorney for Medical Care (DPAMC). I can’t imagine anything more heart-wrenching than being in a hospital without my partner at my side because our relationship has no legal status in our state (FL). The ONLY way to prevent this is to execute a DPAMC. Copies of this document should be given to your medical professionals, families, employers, attorneys (if applicable), stored in your vehicles and carried with you. This is the first document we drafted because the consequences of not doing so far outweigh any financial concerns. Again, this document is best drafted, or at least reviewed, by a competent attorney in your home state.
Sensitivity to non-traditional couples is generally increasing and the medical profession is staffed by some of the more compassionate members of our society but I am not willing to risk separation from my partner at the time of greatest need. What about you? Do you have these agreements in place?
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Carol Christie is a Registered Investment Advisor and has a fee only financial coaching practice serving individuals and small businesses with a special focus on non-traditional couples.
Photo credit: stock.xchng.
I’m glad you brought this up, Carol. Do you know if there’s a website that says what the requirements are in each state for filing this?
Thanks for your comment Serena. One good resource is http://www.lawdepot.com. They’ll take you through a questionnaire and then allow you to print once you pay for the document. The least expensive option is $15.99. (A deal compared to legal fees). Another is Suze Ormon’s site. Via HRC, she has offered access to her Will and Trust kit online. She also has a questionnaire that first establishes whether you need a Trust in your state and then moves onto these other documents (DPAMC,DPAFM). They cover the bases in all states by including spots for notarization and 2 additional witnesses. Use gift code: HRC
Pam and I are lucky enough to have found a great lawyer in town that guided us through this process. Even though we’re legally married in MA, once we leave the state all bets are off. This is important stuff- great post.