My Financial Implosion: Keeping Sane
‘œThe statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re okay, then it’s you.’ ‘“ Rita Mae Brown
In response to my earlier post about my home going into foreclosure, a number of readers asked how I managed to keep my sanity and minimize the impact my bankruptcy had on my work productivity. To be honest, it wasn’t easy. For a long time, it seemed that at every turn, my life situation was becoming worse and worse.
During my crisis, I did my best to do the following:
1. Keep work and personal business separate. I did my best not to discuss my financial problems with co-workers, even those I considered friends. I knew office gossip could turn very ugly, and I didn’t want to draw any more attention to myself than absolutely necessary. I also made it clear to my creditors in writing that calls at work were unwelcome. Fortunately the Fair Debt Collection Practices Act was on my side, and collectors respected my requests.
2. Be aware of the bigger picture, but focus on short-term, achievable goals. For me, the big picture quickly became overwhelming. I had to list over 1,200 creditors on my bankruptcy filing, and I knew I had to pack up my house and find both a storage unit and an affordable place to live. Rather than worry about everything, I broke up each task up into manageable bits. When it came time to file bankruptcy, I attacked it a piece at a time. I put together my lists of creditors, business customers, and assets separately. I attacked my move in much the same way. I prioritized and gave myself small goals. Rather than try to pack the entire house, I focused on packing up non-essential items first, saving the things I could not live without for last.
3. Try to keep focused on the task at hand. When I was at work, I did my best to keep my focus on work. When I was at home, I focused on whatever task I’d set out for myself. When I was working on my bankruptcy filing, I tried to stay focused on that, rather than letting myself worry about everything else that was going on in my life.
4. Focus on things that are controllable. I couldn’t control when the bank foreclosed on my home, what the trustee would say during my bankruptcy hearing, or the reactions of my friends. What I could control were my actions and reactions.
5. Take time out. I did my best to try and take time for myself. During the worst of my financial crisis I couldn’t really do much other than to go for a walk, write in my journal, or watch television, because I had no money. Even so, I made it a point to do small things for myself.
6. Be aware that this too will pass. I frequently reminded myself that even though it seemed otherwise, the crisis would eventually pass. Although I didn’t know what the future would hold for me, I held tight to the idea that things would eventually change for the better.
Next in series: Buying a Truck After Bankrupcy
Photo credit: stock.xchng
Alex, I have really been learning a lot from your experience. I think these tips can apply to almost any situation, not just foreclosure and bankruptcy.
Thanks, Serena. I’m glad that my posts are helpful.
On Saturdays I lead a workshop for people who are in similar situations as this one. I’m printing these suggestions out and sharing them with the participants- these are too good to remain just on the internets!
Also, I’m a big fan of the FDCPA- I wish more people knew about it!