AppleFor this week’s News Bites, I’m doing a semi-rant on news, although, I’m not quite ranting about news because I’m mostly responding to the tech buzz Apple generates, a lot of which shows up in financial press blogs.

Screw it — I’ll just make this an open letter to Apple. Feel free to chime in.

Apple,

I cannot keep up with you. You spark more rumors than Miley Cyrus.

I need a new computer, and I’m not one of your customers who can afford to replace mine every time you update a model. But you keep updating your damn models every 6 months! When the hell should I buy my computer?

It’s not like I can count on your retail store for advice. I went into an Apple store last week to look at the MacBook Pro. I told your kinda slow, socially-awkward twinkie employee that I’ve read it’s headed for a major re-design this summer, and if I’m going to fork over $2,000 of my hard-earned money, I’d like to make sure I’m not getting a soon-to-be obsolete design.

He didn’t look so slow anymore. He bold-face lied to me and said, ‘œThose are just rumors. There’s no telling when they’ll change the design.’

I’ve worked in retail, Apple. I know you’re supposed lie to customer’s face like you believe it’s the truth. But c’mon! This is a $2,000+ purchase, not an unflattering V-neck sweater.

I know sometimes you start discounting products before they get replaced by a new model. You’re apparently doing that with 2.5G iPhones now that the 3Gs are coming. But why the secrecy with laptops?

I’ll be happy to give you my money. I love your computers. Just help me and other loyal customers with a little more transparency. I’m sure there will be plenty of people who will snatch up the outgoing models if you discount them.

Celebrities may think it’s cute to keep us guessing about whether or not they’re married, pregnant or in rehab, but you’re no celebrity, Apple. Please come clean about your product launches. Our livelihoods depend on it.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
Concerned Customer

Am I alone in this, or are you readers annoyed by Apple too?