I’m about to hit the six-month anniversaries of my first solo apartment and grown-up job. This time last year, I thought college graduation might kill me’”I am happy to report that I have not only survived, I’m happier, healthier and financially more stable than I was six months ago. So here is the review: what I did right, what I did wrong, what I’ve learned so far.

The best way to deal with the scary adult stuff is head-on. I went through a lot of hackneyed plans and destructive behavior trying to put cushions between me and the thought of being on my own. As it turned out, not only did none of that work, but I’ve felt the most success from doing the scariest possible things, from throwing more money at my debt to smiling, straightening my dress, and walking right into the cheesy singles volunteer day.

As it turns out, cool stuff’”job opportunities, freelance gigs, new people’”are everywhere and easy to find. But I have to look, which is terrifying, and then I have to get phone numbers and give out my card, which is even worse. Practice makes perfect, though.

While all that effort paid off, the best stuff is a surprise. I have surprised myself by drinking less alcohol, being more athletic, spending more time meeting new people, and doing a pretty different job than I expected. Some of those surprises were completely delightful; in other cases, it was hard to let go of my expectations. Still, I can see how they’ve all translated to health and well-being in their own ways.

Also, there are more practical ways in which it helped to be flexible about my expectations. I had no idea I’d get so into cooking and, consequently, saving money at the grocery store, but that helped even out that it’s much harder to thrift-shop an appropriate professional wardrobe than it was my for college gear. My student loans, perversely, are financially easier to deal with than I’d expected, but way more irritating psychologically.

All this talk of flexibility doesn’t mean I’m advocating total freefall’”in fact, I’ve gotten even more into setting and planning concrete goals in the past few months. However, I’m realizing that the way I reach those goals is usually a surprise.

As I’m thinking about it now, I realize that most things turned out completely different from my expectations’”and I’m mostly grateful that they did. I am a person who, when faced with an obstacle, is most likely to nod politely and then scoot quietly around. Sometimes I wish there was more fight in me, but I’ve gotten along so far. So it seems like I’ve learned to get better at doing what I’ve always done’”be flexible, be creative and figure it out.

And also, of course, most daily dramas can be solved by dancing around my living room to the Eagles’ ‘œTake It Easy.’ Well, okay, I knew that before.