Not a Roommate PersonFor this edition of Sleeping With Money, I decided to branch out a bit from the money lessons learned from dating and relationships. It’s a slight stretch, but I thought it would be fun to cover the platonic (and literal) spectrum of sleeping arrangements/co-habitation: Roommates.

The lesson: Figure out if you’re a roommate person before blowing a ton of money on a living situation in which you or someone else will dread coming home to each and everyday. (E.g. passive aggressive notes anyone? Hysterical site!)

I’m using strong language, but the reason is because I cannot fathom why people think having roommates will save them money if they are clearly not cut out to share living space with other people. It’s like spending $100 on a meal you know you’re going to hate. If history has taught you that you don’t get along with roommates, why keep trying? I just don’t believe people can learn to like having roommates. You either enjoy living with other people, or you’d rather have your own place. If it’s the latter, you should either make sacrifices to afford your own place, or accept that living by yourself comes at a premium.

I’m not a roommate person. I used to rationalize to myself and say, Well, I’ve just had bad luck with roommates. Truth is, aside from the male version of Single White Female that I experienced with a certifiable roommate in my first years in San Francisco, I wasn’t all that unlucky. I just wasn’t being honest with myself. I’m a neat freak. I don’t like sharing. Hearing someone shuffle around annoys me. Someone leaves a big mess, and I’m like the Incredible Hulk of bitches a second later. [Oddly, living with my partner is a wonderful and completely opposite experience. Then again, I’ve never had trouble living with a partner before, mostly because I’ve always viewed the apartment as our own place.]

I know that roommate situations are a necessity for some people. I’m happy for compatible roommates who find each other and reap the financial and friendship benefits of co-habitation. It’s those ‘œmy-own-place people’ (like me) who kill the joy in roommate situations for everyone else either knowingly or not. My-own-place people looking to save money are better served by living somewhere with a lower cost of living, or living with their parents until they can afford a place of their own.

To decide whether you’re a roommate person or my-own-place person, here are few resources to help answer the question:

Before You Choose a Roommate– Asks if you even want a roommate, and offers up the pros and cons of a shared living situation. This link also provides quizzes that address practical concerns of neatness and noise.

What Kind of Roommate Are You– Almost every lifestyle concern is brought up in this quiz. I’d also add a question that gauges how people react to cultural differences, which I’ve seen as a source of conflict in some roommate situations. It’s a multiple-choice quiz. If none of your answers are offered as a choice, odds are that you’re really not suited for a roommate situation.

5 Signs You Need a Roommate– Maybe you really are a roommate person? This link offers thoughtful points I never considered.

Take it from me. I’ve wasted time, energy and money moving around trying to find roommate situations I liked, only to realize that the only other person I would ever want to live with is my partner. Roommate situations allowed me to live in some interesting neighborhoods and apartments, but if I had to do it all over again, I think I would have made the necessary sacrifices (like live out of the city) to afford my own place. It would have been a win-win situation for everyone.