Sleeping With Money: Setting Goals and Dreaming Big
‘œGive me the luxuries of life and I will willingly do without the necessities.’ ‘“ Frank Lloyd Wright
I only had a few boyfriends before I came out. Brad happened to be one of them. It was during college and by then we both knew we were gay but in denial. He was worried about what his dad would think. I was worried about God. The fathers eventually became okay with it.
As you can imagine, it wasn’t a hot and heavy romance. In a way it was like pretend-dating where we put on a good heterosexual show. We went on dates but rarely kissed or made out and apparently neither one of us was interested in sex. At least with each other. I think at the time I was actually crushing on Audrey in my accounting class. But that’s for another post.
But Brad and I were buds. We met in the Advertising Club. Okay, we were total geeks too. I remember the first time he walked me to my car and we stood there for what seemed like hours talking about design and Frank Lloyd Wright. Of all the guys that I tried to date, Brad was the only one that seemed to be anything close to a soul-mate. If only his name had been Brenda.
One of our favorite pastimes was driving around Old Orchard and Ottawa Hills, the two nicest areas in Toledo, Ohio. We were young, dreaming big and liked to look at houses. We both wanted a nice home and nice things and trolling through these neighborhoods inspired great conversation about goals and how we were going to get there. We both couldn’t wait to graduate and get the hell out of Dodge.
I eventually moved away. Brad stayed. His approach was conservative and methodical. Mine was more erratic and favored the shotgun approach’¦ trying many different things and hoping something would stick. By the time Brad was thirty, he owned a design firm, a home in Old Orchard and was already rich. I was still trying to come up with a workable plan.
Goals are a funny thing. We can dream big but unless we take action to achieve them, well, they’ll remain just dreams. Brad helped teach me this lesson. He was so smart.
In his mid-twenties he bought a duplex and lived in one half while renting out the other. Over time, he built equity and was able to buy a single family home while renting out the remaining half of the duplex. He owned a home and an investment property while still in his twenties. In his thirties he bought other properties: a rental home in Arizona, a commercial building in Toledo and a condo in Chicago.
Brad inspired me. We’re still friends and I’ve spent the last decade trying to make up for lost time. There’s nothing like a little competition with an ex to spur me on! So make a plan and stick to it. Otherwise it’s just a dream.
Here’s how I did it. What about you?
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