Pet Dilemma: More than Emotional Costs
Thank you for all of your wonderful feedback on my last entry. I had planned to make this next entry about taking out loans for school, but something much more important came up over the past few days:
My wonderful cat Minnie is really sick. Minnie is a sweet, loving, and vocal 12-year old marmalade Maine Coon mix.
I’ve had her for ten years, most of my adult life, and she has seen me through so much. She’s moved house with me countless times, including two cross-country moves. She’s known my exes, she’s made good friends with my partner, and she’s been a constant and faithful friend.
Many queers have a special relationship with our pets. As Paula mentioned a while back, pets are our furry children. Even if Barb and I had children of our own, our cats would still be equal members of our family, at least emotionally. I don’t know of any children who require so little, and who will still love you unconditionally. And most parents I know would go to hell and back to give their children the absolute best of everything, whether they could afford it or not.
And while I don’t begrudge any doctor their fee, it’s true that vet bills are expensive, with or without pet insurance. My partner and I are in a financial place right now where we have to put all unexpected stuff on a credit card. And every time that statement comes in, it stings just a little bit, even if the charge was worth it.
But this is my cat. This is my friend. She’s napping next to me on the couch, after a very long day visiting the vet and having tests done, and part of me wants to give her everything I possibly can, no matter what the cost.
I just wish I knew how to afford it. And more than that, I wish I could make her better.
Jan: This is such a tough decision. I know a lot of people think we should have a predetermined “cap” as to the amount of vet bills we can absorb. But when this is happening to you, nothing can ease the pain of seeing your pet suffer and trying to weigh the enormous costs. I’m sorry to hear about your Minnie.
Hi Jan,
So sorry to hear about Minnie. I know how stressful and upsetting it can be when the kids are sick. They can’t tell you what’s wrong. I’ve been through several bouts of bladder infections and crystals with my two and since their father died of a blockage from crystals it is always a crazy time.
I wish you and Minnie the best…hope they can discern what is wrong and have a satisfactory course to make her well.
Hi Jan, I’m really sorry to hear about Minnie as well. I went through a scary time with my 12 yr old Calico this week as she had a couple bumps on her head that I feared the worst for. Thankfully, they were just fatty tumors (the one time it’s ok to be fat!) but it was scary, and I would have paid any amount of money to get the good news.
But before finding out the good news, my partner and I struggled on what a discernible amount for care was. It’s tough, but you do as much as you can, and I know in some circumstances vets can be understanding and work with you on payments, etc.
I wish you the best of luck with your baby..
Hi Jan,
First of all, I want to express my gratitude and admiration for people like you who exist in this world. We need more like you who give animals the respect they deserve!!! I am a volunteer at the SFACC and constantly meet cats who have been ditched by irresponsible guardians who make up a plethora of lame excuses for abandoning their pets; it makes me want to beat those people sensely. So this post has been a breath of fresh air. Thank you for reminding me that good people still exist.
Secondly, I’m so sorry to hear about your baby. I don’t know exactly where you stand financially, but the SFSPCA has a program to help guardians who reside in San Francisco with financial assistance. I’m going to do some research of my own and try to find out if there are other programs out there that may be of help.
Minnie is incredibly lucky to have you.
Thank you all so much for your wonderful comments. Sadly, it turns out that Minnie made our financial decisions for us — her kidneys just shut right down and she crashed hard. The vet said that at that point, the only thing we could do for her would be inpatient hospitalization, and that’s no way for such a wonderful cat to spend her final days. I’m certain that putting her to sleep was the humane thing to do, but I miss her so much.
You can see a great picture of my friend here.
Lylian: it’s good to know that the SFSPCA has such a great financial assistance program. I’ll have to check my local SPCA to see if they have a similar program. And yeah, it makes me mad too when people abandon their pets for no real reason!